Look I’m sorry that I was never the one that you highly admired and spoke on,

The one who called you daily just to make sure you were straight and um….

I’m sorry that I wasn’t the one you really expected to call and the one you really wanted to be head over heels and fall.

See my phone calls were coming but they weren’t who you really wanted them to be from, and so you got angry with me for even calling…and that’s a bit messed up but um…

I’m sorry that chick you really loved broke your heart so bad that the fact of me loving you genuinely simply drove you mad.

See I understand all to well what it feels like to invest your love and have someone treat it like it’s nothing but a tossed nut in the glove.

Man I really tried for you, only because I care and the fact I’m writing about you is because I’m hoping to make you aware.

All the games that the world keeps on playing, I was never that type, because I was all for displaying how I felt for real, and I know that’s uncommon today because we live in a society that’s all about play and comedy hype.

Man you ever had a woman that really wanted you to win? Never thinking about just herself but hoping to open doors to also pull you in? Everywhere I was going, I was trying to bring you along and all I keep hearing is how I’m trying to force this love song. What did I do wrong?

You don’t find to many  women these days that’s not about what they can take from you. You don’t find too many women these days that’s trying to add to you.

I swear part of my heart feels broken because once again I tried and once again I cried just off the fact that I tried.

I hear all day how men want this and that, but truth be told…ya’ll just chasing the available cat. Y’all don’t want a good woman to love you like that. Y’all act crazy when a good woman tries to love you and that’s facts.

No wait…y’all get crazy when its not the one “you want” to love you like that.

I can count on my hands how many times that I have had my heart broken and it’s always been because I was so outspoken. I wasn’t trying to play these games and I never understood those who did, because I thought that was so lame, and such the role of a kid.

It’s complicated.

I’m a bit exhausted with trying and part of me kind of feels like the good in me is dying.

Do they really want something good anymore?

I mean is this what it takes to get  a man?

Treat him like he is nothing and like his heart don’t matter and maybe that will make him feel happier.

Dog him out and never be available for his calls because these are the things the rule books teach women these days and all.

Its complicated.

From this day on, I’ll probably never be the same and I have no one but myself to blame.

It’s complicated.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements